What Not to Say to Someone Living with Lymphoma

It can be difficult to know what to do or say when a loved one is diagnosed with cancer. While we can't share exactly what to say, we can provide a list of statements that may do more harm than good.

Keep in mind that not every cancer patient may interpret these statements in the same way. However, it is best to try and reframe these statements to make sure you won't upset or offend someone with cancer. Make sure not to stress so much about what to say that you don't say anything at all. Cancer patients may feel like people are avoiding them and it usually is a nice change of pace for someone to talk to them like they always have. For more information on clinical trials, treatments, and tips for lymphoma and other cancer, be sure to visit the rest of our website.

Tips to keep in mind

Remember that unless you are a licensed physician, you should not be giving medical advice about treating their cancer or treatment.

Many people think that cancer patients need to feel hopeful and encouraged. There is some truth to that. The problem, however, is that this statement can often come across as condescending. For one thing, no one can possibly know how their cancer treatments are going to pan out.

It is natural to be somewhat curious about how someone was diagnosed with lymphoma. You may even want to know because you want to understand what to look for to prevent lymphoma yourself. However, this is a very personal question that they will likely not want to share with you.

If they have lost their hair (which many lymphoma patients do), they may actually be very insecure and could see that kind of statement as you feeling pity because they don't look so great. In other cases, the person may look fine, but they may still feel terrible. “You look great!” can make them feel like you are questioning the seriousness of their disease and may seem like you are subtly accusing them of exaggerating their condition.

Most lymphoma patients do need some help, whether they admit or not. However, they often have so much on their plate that thinking of something for you to do for them can just add even more stress. A better way to approach helping someone with cancer is asking them if you can do a specific thing for them. For example, you can ask them if you can go buy their groceries for them.

It is human nature to want to make connections to try to make yourself and others feel better. The problem is that lymphoma affects everyone differently. The person you knew may have not had to go through chemotherapy, but that doesn't mean that the person you are talking to doesn't need it.

Some of these statements may be said with good intentions, but they will almost never help in any situation.

Read on for more tips on what not to say to someone living with lymphoma.