“Severe hemorrhoid?”

I am a 31 year old male. No chronic medical conditions. I am not on any medication. I have no known allergies to any foods or medications. I am generally very healthy besides being about 40lbs overweight. I currently have an external hemorrhoid the size of a baseball. I am not exaggerating. It first appeared yesterday and was about the size of a golf ball. When I woke up this morning it was just massive. The pain is excruciating. I cannot walk, I can hardly move at all. Just lying perfectly still the pain is nearly unbearable. I had to crawl my way to the washroom and the pain made me vomit. Is there anything I can do to decrease the swelling/tautness? I do not have health insurance so going to a doctor or the hospital is not an option. Is there any hope of relief? Thank you.