“How can one control anger?”
My friend is 40 years old, and he has difficulty controlling his anger. I've seen this with his wife and while he's driving his car. What should he be doing to control it? Should he go to a doctor?
6 Answers
Dear Concerned Friend,
Is you friend's pattern of angry outbursts a new thing or has he been like this since you have known him? Is it a deep rooted issue or is he manifesting his depression through anger? Not having evaluated him it is difficult for me to suggest what he needs to do to control it. I would definitely have him see a licensed psychologist to find out what is going on and what would be the appropriate remedies for his anger. He will definitely benefit from reading "healing Anger" by His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama. Another good book is by Robert A. F. Thurman called "Anger". There are a couple of other good books: "When Anger Hurts" by, McKay, Rogers and McKay and "Vinegar into Honey", and "The Dance of Anger".
Hope and pray that your friend will take care of the issue of his Anger so that neither he, nor his wife and his well wishers, like a good friend like you, have to suffer unnecessarily.
Take care,
Dr. Lata Sonpal
Is you friend's pattern of angry outbursts a new thing or has he been like this since you have known him? Is it a deep rooted issue or is he manifesting his depression through anger? Not having evaluated him it is difficult for me to suggest what he needs to do to control it. I would definitely have him see a licensed psychologist to find out what is going on and what would be the appropriate remedies for his anger. He will definitely benefit from reading "healing Anger" by His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama. Another good book is by Robert A. F. Thurman called "Anger". There are a couple of other good books: "When Anger Hurts" by, McKay, Rogers and McKay and "Vinegar into Honey", and "The Dance of Anger".
Hope and pray that your friend will take care of the issue of his Anger so that neither he, nor his wife and his well wishers, like a good friend like you, have to suffer unnecessarily.
Take care,
Dr. Lata Sonpal
It is a serious problem. He must recognize his problem first. Then he must visit a specialist. Don't wait.
We have too figure out where his anger is coming from. He might not have an outlet that is healthy enough for him to release his inner feelings. Typically when somebody is angry the underlying feelings is some sort of hurt, rejection, or pain. Anger management helps with this he might wanna try looking for an anger management group that might be able to help him develop better coping skills
I would recommend him taking an anger management class. He may struggle to see that he has an anger issue and would be careful on how you bring it up.
That's hard to say. Ego is a controlling issue and insecurities are right there to follow. Some of the toughest and strongest men have this issue. Im sure he would probably need to see a therapist or anger management group therapy which is even better for him.
Three immediate go-to techniques are: 4-step deep breathing; progressive muscle relaxation; and creating a safe place.
Deep breathe link is: https://www.webmd.com/parenting/raising-fit-kids/recharge/how-to-deep-breathe#1
For muscle tension reduction, the link is: https://www.webmd.com/sleep-disorders/muscle-relaxation-for-stress-insomnia
For creating a safe place, the link is: https://www.wikihow.com/Create-a-Safe-Place i
It is always good to nip anger problems, so seeing a therapist who has experience in anger management would be good.
Deep breathe link is: https://www.webmd.com/parenting/raising-fit-kids/recharge/how-to-deep-breathe#1
For muscle tension reduction, the link is: https://www.webmd.com/sleep-disorders/muscle-relaxation-for-stress-insomnia
For creating a safe place, the link is: https://www.wikihow.com/Create-a-Safe-Place i
It is always good to nip anger problems, so seeing a therapist who has experience in anger management would be good.
