Taking Care of Yourself to Better Take Care of Your Client

The practice of family law exposes attorneys to an emotional, volatile, and extremely stressful work environment. Family law can also be a thankless practice area. It's therefore important for family law attorneys to take care of themselves so that they can best take care of their clients. When people neglect self-care, enthusiasm, enjoyment, and satisfaction can fade over time. Self-care gives a sense of purpose and meaning. Self-care activities have the capacity to increase overall happiness, thus increasing the likelihood of efficacy and success. Examples that have proven effective are rest, leisure, forgiveness, exercise, supportive relationships, personally interesting hobbies, meditational exercises, spirituality, and self-reflection.

Most people have a limit on how much stress, suffering, and sadness they can tolerate. For those with a low tolerance, pleasant, soothing, and joyful energy is needed on a consistent basis in order to thwart negativity and produce feelings of renewal. Unfortunately, a one-size-fits-all approach is unavailable. Successful education, integration, sustenance, and adoption of individualized self-caring practices come from knowing yourself while restricting the common practice of comparing yourself to others. If you are wondering if you are doing a decent job of taking care of yourself or how your self-care strategies could be improved, review the following list and reflect on your practices:

1. Self-caring is a number of diverse and variable identified activities that have to potential to help the individual feel their best. 

2. Self-caring is thoughtfully scheduled and planned out.

3. Self-caring starts and ends at any time, and can happen anywhere.

4. Genuine self-care consists of acknowledging that your physical, emotional, psychological, and relational well-being are intertwined, interactive, and interdependent.

5. Self-care helps one preserve boundaries and removes the sources that drain one from their full potential.

6. Continuously and realistically indulge in a self-care inventory and consider making adjustments as needed.

7. Surround yourself with people that can teach you something.

8. Take into consideration that ‘quality’ always supersedes ‘quantity’ when it comes to self-care.

9. Remember that self-care is a necessity that is non-negotiable in achieving the balance and happiness of fulfilled living. The costs of ignoring yourself while constantly meeting the needs of others can have serious ramifications.

Those who don’t 1) take the time to exercise regularly, 2) have a balanced and nutritious diet, 3) get enough rest, 4) engage in enjoyable activities, and 4) practice forgiveness, can become anxious, depressed, and less productive. Simply put, self-care is about feeding your core sense of who you are. It’s about valuing the needs and desires that emerge from your body’s wisdom. It’s about understanding that taking care of yourself is the essential ingredient in taking care of others. Self-care also means abandoning the idea that some type of authority exists that knows more about what your body needs than you know yourself.

Sometimes getting what you need means just taking a few minutes during your hectic day to be quiet. One’s own growth cannot be ignored. To manage everyday stressors, it's necessary to put effort toward focusing on compassion and acceptance of others, as difficult as that may be. Rising above the struggles of daily life requires effort. Thoughts, feelings, and actions must be regularly examined. Wounds, whether old or new, must be healed.

Self-care should be placed near the top, not the bottom, of the family law practitioner’s personal totem pole. It needs to be taken seriously to maintain health and to improve or restore wellness by ensuring a healthy mind, body, and spirit. Self-care enables the practitioner to be at his or her personal best, thus allowing for the best service to the client.